Mile Marker #26: The Good, the Bad, and the Pandemic-ish, Apocalypse-ish Boreal Disaster
I’m a little stuck on a short story I’m writing. I’m absolutely in love with the first half but I’ve sort of lost the thread going into the second.
I felt this way about the last short story I wrote, which ended up being a 7,700-word monstrosity my critique group and I whittled down to a 6,500-word beast…
…which wound up getting picked up by Obsidian Butterfly, so, I guess I was doing SOMETHING right. (Note: I actually typed “write.” I’m that tired, aren’t I?)
(Additional note: I need to figure out what’s going on with my laptop because it’s been overheating like crazy. No bueno.)
In the last month—really in the same two-week stretch—I got my acceptance to UAF, I placed my short story “The Pit and the Pensioner” at Cosmic Horror Monthly (I can say that now, yay!), and I nabbed a spot in Obsidian Butterfly’s Horror Over the Handlebars anthology.
The latter is for “19 Miles from Millstone, June 17th, 1988,” a total scratch rewrite of a concept I created in undergrad but fleshed out (that’s funny for reasons) last month for submission to this anthology.
It’s extremely exciting because I made it into that anthology with a close friend of mine, and I’m delighted we’ll see our names in print together. I cleaned up my author bio to include (Jeebus Crepes, I am never going to get over this, am I?) my upcoming time at UAF, award almost-win, and publications.
I got it squeaky-clean and shiny and I only feel a little bit full of myself (and even more full of imposter syndrome).
I really wanted to have this short finished by now, or at least a first draft done, because the submission deadline is March 31st at 11:59 PM Eastern. (Really, April 1st at midnight, but who’s being picky?) I know I’m going to finish it regardless but this concept is a great fit for the submission call, and I really don’t want to miss that window.
Right now I’m struggling because I had such a clear idea of the plot, characters, and writing style when I started the piece, but I feel like I’ve fallen off an edge somewhere in the middle.
I also keep getting distracted by the 5,000-word cap, feeling like I need to wrap everything up in like half a page, but I know that’s silly because word count caps are for editors to worry about. (And by editors, I of course mean Future Maggie™.)
The lyricism I was pushing in the first half has also kinda gone away for the sake of brevity and plot in this second half, and I’m really hurting for the magic I had before. I’m sure it’ll come back in edits, but the time limit and my general exhaustion from work/travel aren’t making it easy.
I share all this not simply to complain but to rehash every writer’s process. Word vomit, word magic, word pit, word vomit, word magic, sacrifice a goat or two, and suddenly there’s something beautiful on the page.
I can’t overstate the value of a good critique group here. My online group has proven to be stupendous, supportive, and brilliant — everyone in that little Discord server is simply bursting with raw talent and I value their feedback and cheerleading so gol'-darn much.
I know I’m going to get this done, and it’ll be gorgeous with my critique group’s help, I’m just tired and cranky and expecting tomorrow to be a really long day. (Wednesday too, come to think of it.)
I also still need time to refine an oldie-but-goodie to submit to this same call, since they allow multiple submissions and it fits the theme (or at least, it will with some relatively minor tweaking).
I’m in California right now for work and I don’t get back until late, late, late on Wednesday. I’ll at least have the weekend to drop everything and work on these, but I also want to spend time with my niece and my parents since they’ll be in town. Plus, I have a feeling I’m going to get home from all this travel and promptly get super sick, since that’s what I seem to do when I’m stressed and overtired.
At least most of this stress and overtiredness is fun? I had an amazing weekend in San Francisco with my best friend, who I hadn’t seen in almost two years. I got to meet my coworkers in person today, and tomorrow I’ll be at a work event I’ve been looking forward to for months.
Then on Wednesday, I have the whole plane ride(s) home to work on these two shorts, and hopefully get finished drafts in front of my critique group before the weekend.
It’s all doable, of course. And we all know I get my best work done when I’ve got a deadline breathing down my neck. It’s just hard to write good fiction when I’m running at half-power and relying on maybe half a brain cell (possibly down to a quarter after squeezing out another thousand words tonight).
But hey! That’s what the power of optimism and VIOLENT POSITIVITY is for!
These deadlines ain’t nothin’, and I’ll get them done. I just get to complain about it first.
Back to the wilderness! (AKA, bed. The true wilderness can wait for tomorrow.)
Til next time,
Mags